SupGrl.

One day I will teach your children.

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

I like that people are wearing masks everywhere now because it means I can fart freely.

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

Sometimes, when my cat ignores me, I whistle at him like R2D2. He still ignores me.

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

Who decided on the nutrition facts portioning for cheese? 3CM cube? Noone stops eating cheese after a 3cm cube, lets me real here.

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

someone just burped INTO my hair. #Ihatepublictransit

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

I don't take selfies bc I'm afraid someone else will show up in the photo behind me

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

I base a lot of my style choices off of Detective James Crockett from Miami Vice.

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

I tried to get my cat to do a catbeard pose with me. She has never been so upset.

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

Bat cave bat cave bat cave. #fnlrom

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

The smell of sunscreen is a sure sign summer is around the corner. That and the girls dressed in a surprising lack of clothes.

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

The adorable toddler on the bus quickly stopped being adorable once he was handed a recorder.

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

My dad made a good observation: "How come Goofy can talk but Pluto can't?" WAY TO MAKE NO SENSE DISNEY!

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

Howd the phrase 'the proof is in the pudding' come abt?Did criminals leave hints in pudding centuries ago and that's how they got caught?

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

My work needs to spend more money on tissues. I am blowing my nose with 1ply sandpaper.

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

While inhaling to sneeze I managed to suck in a piece of my hair,which made me gag and distracted me from continuing the sneeze- Worst.Ever.

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

"Your cat kind of looks like Samuel L. Jackson from Django when he looks at you" - @tulkbee

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

I want an iPhone simply because I find autocorrects hilarious.

[Father Kelly @FatherKelly]

If I ever date I'm going to serve a pervy sounding meal of suckling pig, fingerling potatoes and moist pound cake. So she knows.

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

@BillCorbett ghost busters?

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

There is an overwhelming smell of curry and axe body spray on this bus

[SupGrl. @SoupKnife]

Noone ever looks good yawning.