Websterrr

When I search my bra size, I do get the choice of "nursing" or "full coverage" so you could say I have options.

[Websterrr @TriSarahTots]

Every hour is happy hour when you're a ray of fucking light and positivity.

[Tig Notaro @TigNotaro]

“the worst that can happen is you fail” yeah that is literally so embarrassing

[cats being weird little guys 👅 @weirdlilguys]

me doing my best

[Ben Boven @benboven1]

30 years ago, 4 Non Blondes asked us a question we still can't answer.

[Ryan Bosch @MrRyanBosch]

I got to the @donwinslow event in Providence a bit early and he was in the lobby! So stoked to get to meet him. If you haven’t read any of his books, please go search him out. Read CITY ON FIRE and then read his CARTEL trilogy. #DonWinslowBookClub

[Holly Ballantine @HollyBallantine]

Alcohol is like hey wanna hang out tonight and regret it the next two days?

[Kicepeople_ilonggo's @kicepleilonggo]

Friends that understand your anti-social phases are important.

[MC Watt @mcwattsup]

Did you really move if you don’t have a box or bag full of the miscellaneous stuff that never made it into the organized boxes you’ve already packed?

[Andy H. @AndyAsAdjective]

One way to tell if a funeral home is not very good is if they send your loved one’s cremated ashes to someone else by mistake. That’s a dead giveaway.

[Shari VanderWerf @Shariv67]

You guys, the government is merely keeping our money safe because they know we'd blow it all on extranagavnces like food and shelter.

[Websterrr @TriSarahTots]

SANTAAA!! I KNOW HIM!! #ElfForGeorgia

[Rachel @femaleredhead]

you can’t just respect the penis. you’ve gotta

[Websterrr @TriSarahTots]

@didgeridougrou Same on both fronts.

[Eddie Dougrou @didgeridougrou]

A “beyond burger” implies the existence of a “bed burger ” and a “bath burger”

[ryan @Ryface]

at least the nra is speaking out against government overreach and the rights of black gun owners to defend their homes just kidding

[Rachel @femaleredhead]

i wanna s your d (support your dreams)

[Caitlin @caithuls]

A spicy wine? Oh you mean a jalapiñot?

[Websterrr @TriSarahTots]

Me after listening to this masterpiece

[Lance Reddick @lancereddick]

As you can see, I do read your replies. A soda can reading...

[Jennifer Wright @JenAshleyWright]

After 4 months of social distancing I feel like Jack in The Shining could have kept it together a little better. He had THREE people to talk to and a HUGE HOUSE with LOTS OF GHOST FRIENDS.

[Jennifer Wright @JenAshleyWright]

U.S.: If only there were some way to beat coronavirus, but no one knows

Every country that's beaten COVID: We listened to scientists and paid people to stay home.

U.S.: We'll just never know