Old People in Church

Things the old people at my church say.

[Old People in Church @WhatTerrySays]

Had to write an email for the receptionist.

Just a regular email.

[Old Church Grump @OldChurchGrump]

Why are you all celebrating "Harvest Festivals" at your churches when the only thing you harvest is bags of candy from WalMart.

[Church Curmudgeon @ChrchCurmudgeon]

"Mr. Curmudgeon, if you were president, how would you deal with leaks?"

"Depends."

[Old Church Grump @OldChurchGrump]

Just because I complain about everything doesn't mean I'm angry enough to leave, pastor.
You're not getting off that easy, bub.
No-sir-ree

[First Jimothy @First_Jimothy]

I see the #church secretary is still having copier problems:

[Old People in Church @WhatTerrySays]

It's just PowerPoint!! @Twinsmama2005

[Old People in Church @WhatTerrySays]

When ur told that the old guys doing sound can't put the pastor's sermon notes on the screen bc "it's too complicated" @Twinsmama2005

[Small Church Pastor @SmallishChurch]

We're moving the church service time up from 10am to 8am this weekend just to find out who really loves Jesus.

[Old People in Church @WhatTerrySays]

"Online giving will just discourage people from coming 2 church. They'll just be able 2 tithe without being here!" #convenienceisimportant

[Worship Sound Guy @WorshipSoundGuy]

11th commandment: Thou shall not attempt to use a gong in worship. EVER.

[Old People in Church @WhatTerrySays]

Pastor asks me to remind him of his appointments. He has an iPhone. 🙄 #heySiri #oldpeople @Twinsmama2005

[Old People in Church @WhatTerrySays]

Caught my pastor trying to take the battery out of his #iPhone to reset it #no #dontdothat #justno #oldpeople @twinsmama2005

[Worship Sound Guy @WorshipSoundGuy]

Can you turn the harp up in the mix and turn the guitars down , thanks! #whatthewhitehairssay

[Justin Powell @doogiebob]

These are the kind of wonderful people I follow on twitter. @ChrchCurmudgeon @SSeminarian

[The Babylon Bee @TheBabylonBee]

"If God is everything you say he is, how can you possibly explain Jar Jar Binks?" https://t.co/IPJJ94D9Yo

[Old Church Grump @OldChurchGrump]

We don't have stained glass windows in the sanctuary, but we have plenty of coffee stained pews.

[The Babylon Bee @TheBabylonBee]

Zondervan Releases ‘Choose Your Own Adventure’ Bible https://t.co/PrKKruWlMr

[Old People in Church @WhatTerrySays]

"I need one of them #Apple experts." Johnny Appleseed? #bespecificTerry #oldpeopleandcomputersdontmix @Twinsmama2005

[Old People in Church @WhatTerrySays]

Church got new email domains. Took an hour to get emails re-set up on the old people's phones. #howdoIemail #howdoIinternet @Twinsmama2005

[Old People in Church @WhatTerrySays]

The Internet is basically just email and Facebook (according to old people) 😜 #oldpeopleinchurch @twinsmama2005