Joshua

Southern Boy, Catholic, D&D player

[NASA Mars @NASAMars]

Still making tracks and doing science!

Since breaking the all-time off-world driving distance record on Oct. 11, Perseverance has continued work on the Red Planet.  ½

[Rya Jetha @ryajetha]

What a lede from @TheEconomist

[Derek Devicemanager @IT_unhinged]

Security called me at 6:12 AM today.

"Patch every PHP server immediately."

I asked what happened.

"Two critical vulnerabilities. Remote code execution. No authentication required."

Cool.

How many PHP servers do we have?

According to inventory: 12

According to reality:

Nobody knows.

We found one running WordPress.

Three running old internal tools.

One under someone's desk.

Two inside vendor appliances.

A forgotten employee directory from 2016.

And a server named:

PHP-OLD-DO-NOT-TOUCH

Naturally, that one runs payroll exports.

Then we found a PHP 5.6 box.

I asked who owned it.

The documentation said:

BRIAN.

Brian left in 2019.

We called Brian.

He said:

"Oh wow, that's still running?"

Excellent.

By 8 AM, leadership joined the incident call.

CEO:

"Can hackers actually get in?"

Security:

"Potentially yes."

CEO:

"Without a password?"

Security:

"Yes."

CEO:

"Then why do WE need passwords?"

Not the lesson.

Finance asked if we could wait until the weekend to patch because downtime affects revenue.

Security explained that the alternative was letting strangers execute code on our servers.

Finance asked for a cost comparison.

At 9:17, someone suggested temporarily taking the vulnerable websites offline.

Marketing refused.

"Our campaign is live."

So for the next hour, the company officially decided maintaining a landing page for 20% off webinar registration was more important than preventing remote server takeover.

We finally patched everything we could find.

Then our scanner discovered another PHP server.

Hostname:

TEMP-PHP-2014

Uptime:

4,512 days.

Nobody knows what it does.

Nobody owns it.

Nobody can shut it down.

But every time we block network access, the warehouse stops printing shipping labels.

Security has classified it as critical infrastructure.

It is running PHP 5.4.

The vulnerability has existed longer than half our employees.

The emergency patch took four hours.

Finding out what PHP actually runs took eleven.

The internet isn't held together with code.

It's held together with servers everyone is afraid to turn off.

[NASA Ames @NASAAmes]

A cosmic butterfly 🦋

In this shimmering view captured by @NASAHubble, the complexities of the Twin Jet Nebula are seen in striking detail, with lobes of material stretching outward while jets of gas stream from a central star system.

[Doodle Sharky @spaceshark23]

"Malfoid is the perfect example of how much damage pornography can do to men."

The pornography in question:

[Tyler Spalding @FloridaPA27]

Imagine sailing east out of China in the 1500s and having no idea this was waiting for you a week into your journey.

[eirinpatriot @tohofuny]

The only time a German was funny and they immediately had him sent to his death

[Joshua @_Messier_33]

A fair compromise

[liv @livvyivvyivvy]

@WysteriaGrove She doesn't need to break up with him she needs to beat him

[Joshua @_Messier_33]

Oh my lawd

[🪻wysteria #TESTACULT🪻 @WysteriaGrove]

friend just called me asking for advice because his gf wants to break up after she had a miscarriage and he wouldn’t go to the hospital with her because he stayed up late playing deadlock the night before and wanted to sleep

[Wyatt @Cornell_Slampig]

nigga was wearing troonsox and had a boner right before he lit up

these niggas have got to be locked away and discord needs to crack down on trannyshit

[Fernando el católico, Señor de los Gamos 🇪🇸🇻🇦ن @SrdelosGamos]

«Los reaccionarios, por alguna razón, piensan que el amor romántico es algo especial y mágico, y no algo tan mundano, aburrido y común como el comer».

[遠藤 英之 @Endo_510]

タシギのダンス。
2026.9.27 秋田県

[Tristanovich🇩🇰🇪🇺 @LoeveTristan]

Suspiciously Alberta shaped oil field

[vittorio @IterIntellectus]

> be the wife
> finds out my X card has a 3% cashback
> “the more I buy the more money I’m making?!”
> “well that’s not really how it works…”
> takes the card
> a week later
> *+$280 cashback rewards”
> “I basically earn $1200/month!”
> …

girl math is going to be the end of me

[Abe Strongjohn @AbeStrongjohn]

Retroactively making Dumbledore gay makes his relationship with Potter way creepier, so yeah, it also adds depth that the cuck who loved Potter's mom would blast the queer who took unusual interest in the kid.

[timberdoodlelover @labradortwister]

content. happy. sitting in the snow. joyful.

[𝑿𝒊𝒏 𝑨𝒖𝒓𝒂 @LovelyXinAura]

He's doing well. 🥰

[timberdoodlelover @labradortwister]

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW