Allison

it's the remix to ignition. there's no food in the kitchen. my life is a mess and i can't afford my tuition.

[brenna @humanbrennapede]

Her sister was a witch, right? And what was her sister? A princess. The wicked witch of the east, bro. You’re gonna look at me and tell me that I’m wrong? Am I wrong? She wore a crown and she came down in a bubble. Grow up, bro. Grow up.

[Elizabeth Kidd-Chamberlain @libbuh]

Beyoncé put Lemonade out on all streaming platforms because she knew Kate Middleton needed it but didn't know if she used Spotify or Apple Music.

[trish @ultragloss]

when the jonas brothers said “ive been to the year 3000, not much has changed but they lived underwater” they were trying to warn us that our human greed and unsustainable habits are causing rapid climate change and raising sea levels at alarming rates. in this essay i will

[Allison @allisonkielbasa]

This is still the funniest thing I’ve ever seen

[Lin-Manuel Miranda @Lin_Manuel]

Gmorning.
Life’s a marathon, not a sprint!
But we don’t know when the marathon ends!
So...sometimes sprint?
Intermittent sprints?
Pace yourself! Hydrate!
You look cute in the shorts!
Let’s go!

[DESIGN GENIE @kvngSpice]

Morgan freeman reviewing 2018 is the best thing I have seen today 😂😂😂
https://t.co/icShgJKw5K

[Jef Mancera @superjefman]

straight line:
__________

dashed line:
___ ___ ___

phylogenetic tree of angiosperm emojis:

🌷🌴🌾🎋🌹🌸🌺🍁🌵🌼🌻
| | |___| |__| |__| | |___|
| |___| |______| | |
|____| |________|____|
|_________________|

[Allison @allisonkielbasa]

@JillianDaniels You’re welcome 🤷🏼‍♀️😝

[Emily @wademily]

this is actually how orientation leaders act when incoming freshmen show up

[Allison @allisonkielbasa]

@JillianDaniels We are all dying internally and the only way to fill the void is yeet

[Allison @allisonkielbasa]

University has taught me one very real thing:
I am definitely a cat person and don’t understand the dog hype

[Lin-Manuel Miranda @Lin_Manuel]

EXCUSE ME ARE YOU HAPPY?

[m (〃ω〃)♡ @maexrene]

this is a magic pig
    /\
   /  \
.∧＿∧
( ･🐽･)つ━☆・*。
⊂　 ノ 　　　・゜+.
しーＪ　　　°。+ *
rt and you will ace your finals. if you don’t you’re fucked

happy kwuanza :O

[Hey Emma 💋 @sleepybreee]

last night a guy in a turtle costume grabbed the straw out of my drink, threw it on the floor, and said
“that’s for my homies”

[Dodes @DakotaWoodward3]

If Cardi B was from Canada she’d 100% be from Hamilton, Ontario

[Cupid’s Nut ♥ @damn_lui]

ants on their way to go pick up a crumb

[Allison @allisonkielbasa]

@Contessila YOUR HAIR WAS UNNATURALLY PINK AND YOU WERE SO QUIEt I was terrified