andy benson

[andy benson @avbenson]

@dirkchatelain Picking up where last season left off

[The Babylon Bee @TheBabylonBee]

Church Disappointed To Discover Man Speaking In Tongues Actually Just Exchange Student https://t.co/NkuEA6u7n9

[Church Curmudgeon @ChrchCurmudgeon]

Anybody want to fold some bulletins?

[Benjamin Netanyahu - בנימין נתניהו @netanyahu]

With US Secretary of Defense James Mattis. Israel has no better friend than America. America has no better friend than Israel. 🇮🇱🇺🇸

[GSElevator @GSElevator]

Millennials fight to raise the minimum wage, then admit to preferring screens to human interaction. McDonald's grants ONE of their wishes.

[NOTSportsCenter @NOTSportsCenter]

"I can't call a foul on them EVERY time LeBron, I'm sorry."

(pic via @CaptTouchback) #NBAPlayoffs

[andy benson @avbenson]

#NewProfilePic

[Benjamin Netanyahu - בנימין נתניהו @netanyahu]

Happy Easter from Jerusalem to all our Christian friends around the world!

[NOTSportsCenter @NOTSportsCenter]

When you're found not guilty of a double murder, but are still in jail for life because of another murder:

[NOTSportsCenter @NOTSportsCenter]

BREAKING: LeBron James died tonight due to a fatal tap in the back. May he rest in peace.

(Video via @rachaelhoops)
https://t.co/I64MIsB4Be

[Sam Burnham @C_SamBurnham]

@BenSasse there are two kinds of countries. Those who use metric and those who have walked on the moon.

[Lincoln Journal Star @JournalStarNews]

Measles case confirmed in eastern Nebraska https://t.co/HKgoBsn8El

[andy benson @avbenson]

@BenSasse do you feel like doing more town hall meetings after today?

[The Babylon Bee @TheBabylonBee]

Miraculous: Clump Of Cells Transforms Into Fully Formed Baby Upon Womb Exit https://t.co/C29HsV8WMy

[andy benson @avbenson]

WAIT! Do the suspects identify as males??? https://t.co/MHbO5pU1B1

[Lincoln Police @Lincoln_Police]

LPD responding to Pinnacle Bank,1776 S 70th, on a robbery. Avoid the area, police searching for 2 teen suspects- 1 black male, 1 white male.

[Daniel Schneider @dschneid12]

I wish I loved anything in this life as much as my daughter loves Bubblepuppy.

[NOTSportsCenter @NOTSportsCenter]

REPORT: Guy who made 15 brackets is ready to brag about being smarter than you when his 9th bracket does better than the only one you made

[Pete Ricketts @PeteRicketts]

Gov. Ricketts: First beef shipped from the United States to Israel in over a decade came from Nebraska last year. #NEGAC17

[Pete Ricketts @PeteRicketts]

Gov. Ricketts: Preferred Popcorn of Chapman signed a new deal with their business partner during China trade mission last fall. #NEGAC17

[HoopPosting @HoopPosting]

Babysitter of the year...
#Division6Bound
https://t.co/9rLnaEKOlk