colleen !

doin bits

[colleen ! @colleen_flem]

laying on the floor listening to Mac Miller at full blast hbu?

[kk 🦋 @kkrespawned]

Honestly shocked that TMZ can’t figure out if McConnell is dead or not (he is). Why do we even have TMZ DC if not for this

[katelin @loud_socialist]

sorry it is insane to write headlines like this when your women's team is the most successful women's team in football history

[t3mple is seeing cortis @catyufan]

my father once said this:

[Jason @pdfmafia_]

Sending this to her and saying “us”

[John Pointless @JohnPointless_]

I find it very fitting we all died together

[Ashley Reese @offbeatorbit]

ate us up ngl LOL

[Vance Munson @GT_____]

I like how the kid’s instinct is to go for the handshake before he even sees Haaland, veteran move

[Prem Thakker @prem_thakker]

Goes to one Knicks game and they lose for the literal first time in 2 months. Calls the head of FIFA to make him overturn a red card and then the US loses in one of the worst matches of the tournament. No one does it like him, it’s actually amazing

[Mac @GoodPoliticGuy]

Just got off the phone with Mitch McConnell, he told me aahhh shit it’s hot fuck there’s so much fire oh god reagans here too fuckkkk

[Books Behind Borders @MHTruthUltra]

I remember when I was young they had these people called “investigative journalists” who could find out stuff like if a senator was dead or not

[🍃 @cardamomkiss]

I was looking at Erling Haaland's Wikipedia page and he has a world record for standing long jump as a five year old for 5'4". A kindergartener jumping as far as I am tall! Terrifying little Viking child

[South Centraleño @IkeMoses]

I live in California. Mexico is the home team.

[colleen ! @colleen_flem]

If the FIA has no haters I’m DEAD

[Shwayne Wiskthem @ShaneWiskthem]

I know this is ragebait but as an American you will catch me cold and dead in my grave before you catch me choosing Engl*nd over my sister Mexico

[mari @fcmareee]

ABSOLUTE SCENES

[grace spelman @GraceSpelman]

tweet of the year and it’s not even close

[Walter Masterson @waltermasterson]

Socialism is the fire department putting out your fire.

Capitalism is the insurance company denying your claim.

[sage is killing herself @iluvhaaland]

You have met me at a very Norwegian time of my life

[c ✨ @marxiners]

god bless birthright citizenship, god bless america, and god bless flo balogun

[Beaner Sigel @AndreMartel]

The two most BEAN eating countries of the world face off this Sunday. The winner gets to keep eating beans the loser has to stop. 🫘 #Mex #Eng