Carolyn Ray

You change for two reasons. Either you learn enough that you want to or you've been hurt enough that you have to.

[Carolyn Ray @dboltukhin]

A consensus means that everyone agrees to say collectively what no one believes individually.

[Carolyn Ray @dboltukhin]

That annoying moment when the TV commercials are so long that you forget what you're watching.

[Carolyn Ray @dboltukhin]

Me + Mathematics = Syntax error.

[Carolyn Ray @dboltukhin]

Why couldn't the ghost get a drink at the bar? They don't serve SPIRITS!

[Tracy Macon @MMolokankina]

Who needs a social life when you have Netflix and a fridge full of food?

[Joanne Harvey @OkinshevichbZ2]

A good neighbor is one that does not put a password on their WiFi.

[Tressa Borrego @chichvarina1]

I want to name my 3 kids Ctrl, Alt and Delete, that way If they screw up, I will just hit them all at once.

[Carolyn Ray @dboltukhin]

As I said before, I never repeat myself.

[Jean Washington @chukhontseva191]

Rembrandt painted 700 pictures in his life time and Americans have all 7000 of them.

[Carolyn Ray @dboltukhin]

No God, No Peace... Know God, Know Peace.

[Carolyn Ray @dboltukhin]

Dammit, this spermicide didn't work at all. My kids are still here and now they won't stop whining about their eyes burning.

[Laura Ashley @76Zakhar]

fi yuo cna raed tihs whit no porlbem, yuo aer smrat. rtewete fi yuo aer smrat.

[Madeline Salazar @arsentiykoncha1]

The difference between who you are and who you want to be is what you do.

[Carolyn Ray @dboltukhin]

A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?" Father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

[Carolyn Ray @dboltukhin]

RTETWEE fi yuo raed tihs wihtuot a porblem baecuase yuore jsut taht Asoemwe.

[Kathleen Erickson @2016Purgina]

IRS: We've got what it takes to take what you've got.

[Carolee Tiner @86_pugan]

I look at my best friend & think: Why the hell do I love this crazy person?

[Carolyn Ray @dboltukhin]

You can't play with someone's feelings because you're unsure of your own.

[Carolyn Ray @dboltukhin]

Me + Mathematics = Syntax error.

[Kristina Shepard @1973_valkovich]

Nobody wants to be with somebody that's been with everybody.