emma 🐝

do no harm, but take no shit. namaste.

[emma 🐝 @emvardz]

@McDonaldsCanada why does the "deal" cost more than the regular price??

[emma 🐝 @emvardz]

@McDonalds why does the "deal" cost more than the regular price??

[That Mom Tho @mom_tho]

intermittent fasting? i just slept 7 hours without a snack what more do you want from me?

[meghan @deloisivete]

Saturday is for not getting stuff done but not feeling guilty about it

Sunday is for not getting stuff done but feeling guilty about it

[Sweet Momissa @sweetmomissa]

I’m going to party like it’s 1999 tonight (put my hair in a scrunchie and make a cheap dinner listening to Destiny’s Child).

[Ⓜ️isterD @MisterD78UK]

I’d trade my soul to live in Fraggle Rock these days but like Sesame Street no one can tell me how to get there

[.:RiotGrlErin:. @RiotGrlErin]

the window on a box of pasta offers a visual connection to the outside world, making a space feel more open and comfortable for the pasta.

[gas station dream girl @cheygoulet]

Wіth tired eyes and coffee breath, we all begin our Monday trudge that feels like death.

[Kent Graham @KentWGraham]

If you glue a dead wasp to your palm, you can smack your boss on the back of the head as hard as you want and act like you saved him.

[? @_foxgrave]

microdosing PTO by dissociating at work

[Nayele18 @nayele18maybe]

OMG YOU GUYS, I SAID YES!!!! (he asked if I was out of my mind ❤️😍😍)

[Uptown Schmuck @SchmuckOnAHorse]

People that open the microwave early and don't clear the timer are why we can't have nice things.

[Not Today Eric @NotTodayEric]

Maybe if people only lived 8-15 years like dogs we would treat each other better.

[Kristen @Kica333]

I’m at the age where if it starts after 9pm I’m definitely not going.

[Kristen @Kica333]

Guess who finally got their life together?! Not me, but congrats to whoever you are.

[Jonathan Edward Durham @thisone0verhere]

Now that we’ve all had a month to digest the year, I want you all to stop and think about whether you really want to throw an April Fool’s Day into this mix

[Yogi Bryan @realyogibryan]

20% love and light
80% don’t f*cking try me

[emma 🐝 @emvardz]

WHAT is with all the cats singing APT. ???

[Jonathan Edward Durham @thisone0verhere]

So the worst genre is definitely dystopian nonfiction