Maddy R.

“It was the egg rolls not the ecstasy” - Kenny Powers

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

@DanTheManRyan respects the ruling that Pluto is not a planet. Who am I dating?

[Janel Comeau 🍁 @VeryBadLlama]

outlook: I'm the most powerful office tool ever made. I can search every email you've ever received and keep track of the meetings you have six months from now

me: I would like to still view an attachment after someone replies to the email

outlook: [confused hissing]

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

@jules_mugools Is this why English majors all seem tortured in some way?

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

This might have just cured my depression

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

The presidential version of being the last kid at day care

[Hillary Clinton @HillaryClinton]

Look, it could happen to anyone. https://t.co/tpCx1XoqJa

[Grace Panetta @grace_panetta]

when the trader joe’s cashier asks how my day is going

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

A truly iconic day in history

[depths of wikipedia! @depthsofwiki]

18 years ago today

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

I wonder if our neighbors know that we only turn the front porch light on for the delivery food we just ordered
#homeowners @DoorDash

[Mondaire Jones @MondaireJones]

Could you believe that sh*t?

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

Well there goes me checking out my apples as bananas at the self check out. Gotta get my small thrills somewhere else now.

[Kyle Ocker @Kyle_Ocker]

So Hy-Vee has emailed a press release out that says they are starting a new security force for their stores. Here is B-roll footage they provided, showing the new force — apparently equipped with body cameras, gun, taser, etc. This will launch in "multiple markets" across chain.

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

A wise guy once said: The stock markets isn’t real, the rules are made up and the points don’t matter
#whatistheeconomy

[Avalon Penrose @avalonpenrose]

a normal person explains what’s happening on the stock market:

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

I may have ✨depression✨ but boy oh boy did I feel my serotonin levels rise when yelling at Kim Reynolds during the condition of the state address tonight.
#Iowanice

[Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez @AOC]

Good morning 🌞

Lies are not “differences of opinion.”

Have a great day!

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

Who needs therapy when you can call out another person you went to high school with for supporting a coup and being a fascist

#MotivationMonday

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

Can I personally secede from The United States of America? I still live here but I’m my own country.

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

Can I personally secede for the state of Iowa? Like I still live here but I’m my own state

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

So how long will it take for republican representatives to back pedal 4 years of divisive rhetoric and kissing Trumps ass to “denounce” right wing extremists after storming their place of work?
#USCapitol

[Jemele Hill @jemelehill]

Let’s just be clear about something: The reason the Capitol police were slow to respond is because they gave these white people the benefit of the doubt and treated it like a joke. Their reaction isn’t the same because they see black people as a threat that needs to be eliminated

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

You know what I don’t need. A recap of this years events.

There is no way I will forget the absolute bananas shit that down this year.

[Maddy R. @maddy_irl]

@juliacsonntag