The fastest way to detect manipulation is to watch for people who push urgency without giving you time to think, so build a rule where you never agree to important decisions in the same moment they are presented, because time pressure is often used to bypass your judgment.
Nobody cares.
When you’re winning, nobody cares. When you’re losing, nobody cares. Stop fearing the judgement of people who were never even thinking about you. Nobody is thinking about you. They’re too busy thinking about themselves. Go do the thing.
Simple mindset shifts:
– I'm not hurt, I'm healing.
– I'm not losing, I'm learning.
– I was not rejected, I was redirected.
Negative things happen. Negative mindsets make them harder.
You don't need to chant how amazing you are, or feel inspired by the person you are to win.
You just need to repeat successful actions longer and more diligently than any reasonable person would. And that - thankfully - has nothing to do with how you feel today.
You can boil success into:
Focus + Patience
And they’re so hard because they’re so anti human.
We want new stuff—>unfocused
We want stuff now—>impatient
People fail from poor self control more than poor work ethic or intellect.
You’re not too dumb, you’re too undisciplined.
The people who succeed most in life can do one thing for extraordinary amounts of time without needing immediate reward.
You don't lack self-esteem, you lack self-control.
People who cannot create value often try to create emotional debt. They remind you what they suffered, what they gave, what they meant, what they hoped you would notice. Be careful. Guilt is often the currency of people who have no leverage left.
Your entire life will change when you learn to love what most people avoid. Wake up early. Focus. Move your body. Eat real foods. Obsess over one thing. Read old books. Be present. Listen intently. Change your mind. Have difficult conversations. The recipe for a good life.
No amount of living life in your twenties...
Will make up for being broke in your 30's and 40's.
Tell your friends to f!ck off. Cancel your back packing trip. Learn to print first dear child.
My grandfather told me this: "You’ll achieve much more by being consistently reliable than by being occasionally extraordinary." You can get pretty damn far in life by just being someone that people can count on to show up and do the work. I'll never forget that.
The easiest way to trap a man is to make him proud of enduring what he should have left. Call his suffering loyalty, call his silence maturity, call his exploitation responsibility, and he will stay long after the arrangement has started feeding on him. Pride can become a leash.
What happens when you die:
They divide up your shit.
They summarize your life in 500-1000 words.
People who knew you less say sorry to people who knew you more.
Everyone eats, drives home, and wakes up the next day and goes to work.
Whatever you’re worried about won’t be in those 500 words.
You can dare greatly or not at all, but you’re gonna die either way.
Might as well squeeze every motherfucking drop out.