k🦋

[Justin Whang 🐙 @JustinWhang]

I don’t think I’ve ever seen an IG sketch this dense with jokes

[✰ @hoesluvvjason]

one of the stranger parts of being an adult is realising how many people have never questioned a single belief they inherited, not even out of curiosity.

[k🦋 @peachmangofox]

@bowtiedmeathead Maybe this is due to religious reasons, as conservatism and Christianity usually go hand in hand, and Halloween is often associated with devilish activities.

[Lu for Alaska @luinalaska]

If my husband cheated on me I’d be heartbroken.

If my husband cheated on me with an employee who I let hang out with our kids I’d be irate.

If my husband dressed me and his side chick as thing 1 and thing 2 for Halloween in front of a global audience I’d gut him like a pig.

[k🦋 @peachmangofox]

@itshimbo So my dick remembers everything 🎤

[. @Omgemeraldddd]

Are we actually living through the most chaotic era in human history, or are we just the first generation with social media forced to watch every tragedy on earth unfold in real time, and the world has always been this dark, we were just never close enough to see it?

[JGMMA @TheJGMMA]

You don’t eat cookies at work and they think you got an eating disorder

[Buck @Buck36043Buck]

You could probably Waterboard a lot of Information out of me. I have a Very low tolerance for Discomfort

[COCO @TWOTIMESABITCH]

girl to girl: sometimes you’ll find an old picture of yourself and suddenly realize you were actually beautiful during a time when you spent so much energy criticizing yourself.

[Big Timi @OrevaZSN]

Why don’t airports have movie theaters? If I have a 3-hour layover, let me watch a movie instead of wandering around the terminal like a lost idiot. I’d happily pay for that.

[Big Timi @OrevaZSN]

We’ve officially reached the “eat before you leave the house” stage of the economy.

[k🦋 @peachmangofox]

@stimberbee This sounds like a Childish Gambino lyric

[tree @treeonchain]

an idiot in motion will go further than a genius at rest

[Softboy @softcreateee]

If paying rent on time doesn’t make your credit better, then your credit shouldn’t be checked in order to rent.

[🥷 @_iamhabeeb]

One thing I love about traveling is how it breaks the illusion that your current life is the only life you could live

[Steve 🇺🇸 @SteveLovesAmmo]

Zero debt.
7-8 hours of sleep per night.
Low body fat percentage.
Nutrition is perfect.
Mental health on track.
Zero alcohol and extremely hydrated.

This was my peak. I was 8 years old.

[k🦋 @peachmangofox]

@RealCandaceO You should see what happened recently with @Clavicular0 and that PR campaign. He ended up calling the Israeli media out on live tv

[‏ً @omgsidewalks]

Do you ever get tired of food? Not eating itself, but the never-ending cycle of figuring out what to eat, buying groceries, cooking, cleaning up, and then waking up the next day just to do the whole freaking thing all over again.

[Fav @favwontmiss]

YOU KNOW WHAT KEEPS EVERYONE COOLER IN THE SUMMER? TREES, YOU IDIOTS. GIVE US BACK OUR TREES BACK.