Frederick Dinkledick

That's just some bitch I fucked after I went to see Raisin in the Sun starring Denzel Washington.

[k ☆ @celestialgum]

men will try to flirt with you by saying “you know ball” about bands they think are obscure and the whole time it’s Title Fight

[R.F. Kenmore @rfkenmore]

GATs on foot + Vuori return in hand

Beast mode

[sleepy cowboy @HughGriffin2]

If I was bald you could expect me to turn up to the function wearing some bullshit like this

[saliva plath @cryptofeminism]

Guys that work at weed dispensaries are like “No bro I swear it’s not gonna feel like you’ve been wrapped with bandages and locked in a sarcophagus for 2 thousand years” meanwhile the strain is named The Mummy’s Curse Comes True

[Paris @goodyhilton]

A lot of mental health issues can be solved by isolating and lashing out at people

[dont't @neverdontt]

*walking into tattoo parlor* "yeah can I uhh just get some tattoos please"

[𝒢𝒾𝓁𝒷ℯ𝓇𝓉 @AbakpaJob]

I tell my cat "I know" whenever he meows but I'm gonna be honest, I have no idea

[debo @killmefam]

God too fucked up forgot my shoes at the bowling alley

[Cheapie13 @Cheapie13]

Well it’s about that time

[HowlingSkunkApe @Gigantorifficus]

🔊

[Sinking 🇿🇦🇯🇵🇩🇿🇪🇸🏴󠁧󠁢󠁥󠁮󠁧󠁿🇳🇴🇩🇪 @EisakuOtomo]

Korea vs Mexico: whoever says nigga first loses

[erin 𓆱 @btwntwinpeaks]

(hank hill rubbing his little butt) they don’t call her peggy for nothin’

[son of nurhaci @aisingioron]

Guy at the gym opened hinge and turned his screen brightness all the way down

[Chris P. Wicks 🔎🐜 @CrispyWicks]

"yeah so "getting Shanghaied" came from people getting snatched up and shipped off to China back in the day"

"wow that sounds really disorienting"

"It's extremely Orienting, actually"

[. @playboicurrryy]

how it feels when ur friend tells the waiter what you'll be having

[Daniel C @daneelchia]

That’s Mainlander.