astoldbyher🤍

the evidence of God is in the beauty of His creation

[astoldbyher🤍 @viaDistance]

@TakeThiamine You’re right about dietary cholesterol, but too much dietary saturated fats can reduce clearance of LDL cholesterol leading to high levels in the blood. So diet still matters.

[astoldbyher🤍 @viaDistance]

@Alexandrovna805 Yes

[Kevin Pho, M.D. @kevinmd]

85 to 90 percent of women physicians are eldest daughters.

That is not a coincidence. That is a pipeline.

Eldest daughters are trained, before age five, to over-function. They take on a parent's worry. They organize the family. They clean up without being asked. They do not ask for help, because they were rewarded their whole childhood for not needing any.

Then they walk into medicine.

A career that demands hyper-responsibility, hypervigilance, perfectionism, and silent sacrifice does not have to ask these women to give those things. They were giving them before they could read.

The system is not stumbling into a burnout problem. The system is recruiting from a pool of people whose entire childhood was a training program for it.

This is what pediatrician and certified coach Jessie Mahoney has been finding when she asks the room. In every group, in every retreat. Maybe one or two women are not eldest daughters. The rest have been carrying something since before they could spell their own name.

Most of those women blame themselves. "Why don't I have boundaries?" "Why do I over-function?" "Why can't I delegate?"

Because at five years old, your family rewarded you for over-functioning. Because every teacher praised you for it. Because the medical training system selected for it. Because every job since has reinforced it. The pattern is older than your medical degree by twenty years.

The other piece nobody names: by the time these women are in their fifties, they are carrying eldest-daughter responsibility for aging parents AND running a department as chief AND running a household. The role does not retire when the children do. It just compounds.

Jessie's reframe is the part worth bookmarking.

The "hero" framing is the trap. Eldest daughters were made the savior of the family before they could read. Then medicine made them the savior of the patient. Then the department made them the savior of the team. At every stage, they learned that if they did not do it, terrible things would happen and it would be their fault.

Awareness is the first move. Non-judgment is the second. Excellence is not doing everything yourself. Excellence is letting other people do their jobs.

You are allowed to gift some of it back. You can ask your siblings to carry the aging parent. You can let your medical assistant do the medical assistant's job. You can stop covering the gap that nobody actually asked you to cover.

Most eldest daughters in medicine have never asked for help. When they finally do, they discover people are willing to help. The asking was the whole obstacle.

Listen to the full conversation on The Podcast by KevinMD. Link in the replies.

What is the one task you have been carrying for your family or your team that no one ever actually asked you to carry?

#ThePodcastbyKevinMD

[astoldbyher🤍 @viaDistance]

@lagoonislander @MostlyMonkey Wow you have absolutely no idea what it takes to become a neurosurgeon.

[❦ @saintdoII]

it’s so muggy in here

[Curiosity @CuriosityonX]

Insane footage from NASA Artemis I close flyby of the Moon

[astoldbyher🤍 @viaDistance]

The Drama was good, probably the best acting I’ve seen from Zendaya yet.

[astoldbyher🤍 @viaDistance]

@Alexandrovna805 that looks soo good!

[lay @saoirdaya]

Welcome to GAG CITY

[astoldbyher🤍 @viaDistance]

@Outdoctrination Did you even read the article you posted? That’s not what this is saying….

[astoldbyher🤍 @viaDistance]

@bronzeageshawty Too much caffeine will strain the heart. But coffee itself seems to have neuro protective benefits. So moderation is key. I guess make sure your blood pressure and resting heart rate are within normal limits

[DaVinci @BiancoDavinci]

Incredible hexagonal patterns on an olive tree.

[astoldbyher🤍 @viaDistance]

@brian_eno_69 omg fellow bruin. I lived in the same dorm building as him freshman yr

[astoldbyher🤍 @viaDistance]

Ping pong movie is movie of the year

[crittur @miwwmiu]

In 2026 I’m going to be beautiful and have fun

[astoldbyher🤍 @viaDistance]

@lionesspike vance gilligan loves his little easter egg poisonous plants

[astoldbyher🤍 @viaDistance]

@illegalcaffeine @boyoclips What’s name name of this piece?

[astoldbyher🤍 @viaDistance]

Christ is the source of inner peace

[Matt Welter @_mattwelter]

i have...

- an amazing girlfriend
- making ~$450k this year
- can work anywhere / anytime
- live in a house w/ a pool

yet i have anxiety every damn day, tight chest, hard to take a deep breaths, intrusive thoughts, always feeling not enough, can never relax

what went wrong