Ruth Chapman

Roving scientist for hire. Needs money for cook books and eating out.

[Ruth Chapman @RuthChapman]

@jolosborne @caitlinmoran @battersea_arts cheers mate. The f'ing baby woke up so I switched to cider and had a magnum

[Ruth Chapman @RuthChapman]

@jolosborne @caitlinmoran @battersea_arts jealous! Shout I'm a feminist for me as I drink wine and pray the baby sleeps

[Flat Iron Steak @flatironsteak]

Béarnaise sauce on our burger seems to get the juices flowing....

[Ruth Chapman @RuthChapman]

@tomolpo @PolpoSoho I once had something on a freezing day next to lake Como combining radicchio and scamorza combo - love to try that again

[robmanuel @robmanuel]

Most tweets are improved by reading them in a faux cockney accent and then shouting 'PARKLIFE!'

[Ruth Chapman @RuthChapman]

@realrossnoble I have to know, did you walk dog dirt into her house?

[Eithne Duckels @eittywoo]

@Jon_events @SadiqKhan @TootingOnline lets get rid of antisocial drinking loitering opp sainsbury's in Tooting. Call 101 to report. Pls rt

[Grace Dent @gracedent]

gay shame @ duckie was fun.

[Ruth Chapman @RuthChapman]

@mattischrome You go girl!

[Ruth Chapman @RuthChapman]

@mattischrome REALLY!!??!?! All power to you Matt.

[Alan Machnik @Alan_Machnik]

My new Wombles Pepper Mill is crap. Everything that comes out of it is either over-ground or under-ground.

[𝗧𝘄𝗼𝗽 𝗧𝘄𝗶𝗽𝘀 @TwopTwips]

PROVE you're middle class by filling in an online BBC "what class are you?" survey then worrying about the result.
(via @wallaceme)

[Sunny Hundal @sunny_hundal]

THE DAY BRITAIN CHANGED. Excellent Guardian splash tomorrow. Informing public of changes unlike other media

[Ruth Chapman @RuthChapman]

@mattischrome doooo it, dooo it, dooo it.

[𝗧𝘄𝗼𝗽 𝗧𝘄𝗶𝗽𝘀 @TwopTwips]

DISGUISE breaking wind in public places by shouting "I am Fartacus!" very loudly and hoping everyone else joins in.
(via @xtofallabout)

[Milton Jones @themiltonjones]

Taylor Swift has sent back my trousers unaltered.

[Ruth Chapman @RuthChapman]

@FoodUrchin What about Egg'n'Baker - an 80's Saturday morning cookery show inexplicably hosted by Cheryl Baker

[Standard Going Out @ESReveller]

COMPETITION!!!! RT & Follow us to win £150 voucher to spend on you and a friend @HawksmoorLondon AIR ST BAR!!! #cocktails #barsnacks

[Harrison's @HarrisonsBalham]

Do you fancy a free dinner for two this coming Saturday evening (19th) at the new look Harrison's? Simply re tweet to be entered!

[MagpieManny @MagpieManny]

i thought about nicking the ring off that hobbit, but i just can’t see myself wearing it.