Esther Klima

We don't lose friends. We just learn who our real ones are.

[Betty Knapp @83_klim]

That awesome moment when you're telling a lie and your best friend notices and joins you.

[Esther Klima @fmanilo1]

If they ain't gonna ride for you then they shouldn't be riding with you.

[Esther Klima @fmanilo1]

Don't call my phone with bullshit. Don't text my phone with bullshit. Don't come at me with bullshit. Don't tweet at me with bullshit.

[Pamela Nadeau @tbabalova]

If you did not see it with your own eyes or hear it with your own ears, dont invent it with your small mind and share it with your big mouth

[Esther Klima @fmanilo1]

That awkward moment when a package says "Easy open" & you end up using scissors, knife, hammer and a gun trying to open it.

[Esther Klima @fmanilo1]

10 & Playing. -> 11 & Looking. -> 12 & Kissing. -> 13 & Touching. -> 14 & Sucking. -> 15 & Fu*king. -> 16 & Pregnant!

[Lonnie Hammond @ManizhaZamesova]

Men are born between a woman's legs and spend the rest of their lives trying to get back in them. Why? Because there's no place like home.

[Diana Fontenot @votinov83]

I think car horns should sound like gun shots....I bet you'll move then.

[Anna Hutchings @tauzikha]

Mosquitoes should suck fat instead of blood.

[Esther Klima @fmanilo1]

Don't f*ck with someone else relationship just cause you can't stay in one.

[Esther Klima @fmanilo1]

Teacher:How old is your dad.Student:He is as old as I am. Teacher:How is it possible? Student:Because he became a dad only after I was born.

[Esther Klima @fmanilo1]

I don't have an attitude problem. You have a problem with my attitude, and that's not my problem.

[Maggie Whatley @ArefLady]

If 4 out of 5 people SUFFER from diarrhea... does that mean that one enjoys it?

[Esther Klima @fmanilo1]

"Actually, you were born by c-section, son."

[Rowena Dowdle @turchenkok1]

My mom + My dad - Condom = Greatest person alive.