Top Tweets for #GOPDnd
@The_DrunkDragon More like:
We will gather the town's wealth and add it in. Then the dragon will share it equally.
#DNCdnd
We will borrow from the royal bank and put our children in debt forever and add it to the hoard. Then the dragon will create jobs.
#GOPdnd
Damn. I love this. Who did this? #GOPdnd
DM: A large group of goblins closes in on you
DT: I rally my subjects
DM: They overthrew you last campaign
LG: Oh yeah
DT: Didn't happen, fake adventure
LG: That's right, he's right
MM: <mutters> Just shut up, Lindsey.
#GOPDnD
DM: Youโve got the golem on the ropes. Looks like one more hit should do it!
Mitch: I hold my action.
DM: But youโre last in the turn order, and it goes next.
Mitch: I donโt want the golem mad at me.
#GOPDnD
GOP: I cast โUnityโ after the raid on our castle.
DM: The raid youโ nevermind. Roll a d20.
GOP: 1
DM: The citizens respond with โConsequencesโ. They vote to hold the dragon accountable. Again.
GOP: This is Orwellian!
DM: 10 of you side with the other party.
#GOPDnD
DM: The plague has ravaged the village. To equip you for your fight, the court wizard gives you a ring that grants you +5 to your constitution.
WARRIOR: I don't wear it.
DM: . . .
WARRIOR: It infringes on my rights.
ROGUE: Yeah. The plague is a hoax anyway.
#GOPDnD
grand opportunity party hires Don, who claims to be a lvl20 cleric. they enter a dungeon confronted by several lvl1 skeletons. whole party dies. Don blames DM and players from another party cheating in Pennsylvania. #gopdnd
And on the next level down
William Barrholder #GOPDnD
To add some monsters for our bureaucratic dungeon.
Lich McConnell #GOPDnd
Cleric:...and the holy light turned the zombies away
Fighter: Since some were trolls we doused their remains in avid
DT: So if they return and you're bitten, shine a torch on the wound and drink a little acid so they'll die from biting you
Villagers: ๐ค๐๐คจ
#GOPDnD
DM: After much thought, the king has agreed to open the kingdom's martketplaces despite the plague still being present.
DT: But keep the borders closed
DM: The king says "What?"
DT: Only local peasants, no forgein trade
DM: The king is stunned silent
#GOPDnD
DT: All the kingdom's scribes and clerics have come up with a plan to fight the deadly plague. But I will support the barons and dukes as each of their lands have different circumstances.
(In the Duchy of Chess and Peaks)
Crier: The king urges the overthrow of the Duke!
#GOPDnD
Cleric: This gold we acquired will save the people once we distrib...
What are you doing?
DT: Carving my name on these coins
Cl: But, the rest of us killed the dragon
DT: I...taunted it
Cl: WHILE HIDING BEHIND...
DT: (goes back to carving)
#GOPDnD
DM: You've been cursed by a witch. You have a cough and a fever. You should isolate
ROGUE: I have a healing potion that cures this. I saw the king promoting it.
DM: Yeah, that's not a healing potion. If you drink that it will kill you.
ROGUE: I drink the potion. (Dies.)
#GOPDnD
KING: A dragon is attacking the kingdom. It destroys our homes, eats our livestock and muders the villagers. Will your party slay it?
FIGHTER: Of course. I'm going to need you to do us a favor, though ...
#GOPDnD
@frangeladuo @RadioGuyChris @fromthebunkerjr @robertinflorid @KIResists @KwikWarren @ShomahKhoobi @murie_anita @nobadcats we need to get this trending #GOPDnD
DM: The king's eyes suddenly shift to a dark red. "Fools," he says. "I only wanted this relic to use it for myself!" He hefts the Demon Blade to betray you.
GOP: no he doesn't.
DM: he stabs you all. It's a betrayal.
GOP: only if we didn't WANT to be stabbed
#gopdnd
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