Me, to myself: Okay, just be cool, don't say anything weird
Any woman: *says something that makes me laugh*
Me, out loud: THAT'S HILARIOUS WE SHOULD BE SISTER WIVES BUT WITHOUT THE HUSBAND
Me: I want to meet someone
[I meet someone]
Me: I want to meet someone different
[I meet someone different]
Me: You know what? I‘m better off alone lmao