Johnny Mikey Whitey

Mostly facetious.

[erika @yeeeerika]

they should make a grocery store exclusively for people with spatial awareness

[Johnny Mikey Whitey @jmwsays]

These political quizzes always have incredibly pointed (and stupid) questions and this fucking thing had the fucking gall to call me an I******

[Michael @_britmonkey]

Most political compass tests are stupid and outdated, so I have created a political test that only focuses on REAL ISSUES of the 2020s. 64 questions that score you on four axes, including "Chud v Woke" and "Techbro v Luddite"

Reply with your results & tell me if it was accurate

[Johnny Mikey Whitey @jmwsays]

According to the Oracle I'm fucked for a least 4 more months.

[Johnny Mikey Whitey @jmwsays]

Month away from being 19 doing stand up for an underwear show.

My only regret is not oiling up.

[Dan Baltic @baltic_dan]

> let’s see you at 19

Dan Baltic was *always* a Chad

[Johnny Mikey Whitey @jmwsays]

@emily_sipiora Got all three and we press on

[Johnny Mikey Whitey @jmwsays]

Becoming the Alexander The Great of this world but still ending up having to turn back due to the sight of what's across the Indus River.

[Mrs Ril🥀💍 @MrsRilzk]

In this world, everyone has down syndrome except for one boy! 🍿

[Johnny Mikey Whitey @jmwsays]

Indecent.

[Little Bubby Child @lilbubbychild]

A Claissic by Robert Williams!

[Johnny Mikey Whitey @jmwsays]

Kissed by fire and burdened with a dumptruck

[Trevor Official @TrevorOfficialR]

Redheads usually have a big fat ass what’s up with that

[Dan Baltic @baltic_dan]

“Do you really think I would suck your dick and eat your shit if there remained the slightest chance of your affecting the outcome? I sucked your dick 35 minutes ago”

[Mike Drucker @MikeDrucker]

A lot of people are commenting on this without reading the story. She can’t sell the house because she’s been bricked inside with every exit and window covered with thick masonry like in the Cask of Amantillado. She shouldn’t have insulted the real estate agent but here we are

[🐸🖤 𒁹pallas 🖤🐸 @amazonmilkfrog]

you miss ONE day on this app

[Johnny Mikey Whitey @jmwsays]

Selling everything to fly to The Land of the Rising Sun. I present gifts with haikus and long form poetry of love and romance. She smiles politely and takes my gifts. She then leads me to a pig pen confused on how they got one to wear clothes and walk upright. I live there.

[みのりん🍙👹 @minori_noen]

なんか気付いたら
海外の方にすごいフォローされてる！

私日本語しか話せないけど…
翻訳してくれるから海外の方からの
応援コメント全部読めてます
本当にありがとうございますっ！

日本の秋田県男鹿市で米農家してます
良ければ米の収穫まで見守って下さい🌾
マイブームは小顔体操です！

[Johnny Mikey Whitey @jmwsays]

This is making rounds again, I can't bring myself to listen to the audio. The 'Hisies' in the caption never fails to make my blood go cold

[Johnny Mikey Whitey @jmwsays]

'the type chart makes sense' oh okay, steel is super effective to ice.
do you think that 'makes sense' to the Titanic?

[⊹ @DEAADSEAA]

The Pokemon type chart makes sense so for people to not know it just fries me because why do you not have common sense

[Rebecca Adson @RebeccahAdson]

Samson waking up with a taper fade while being surrounded by philistines 😂

[Johnny Mikey Whitey @jmwsays]

@xngelkitty What about socratically

[Johnny Mikey Whitey @jmwsays]

Faced someone using this for the first time last night.
Really puts the abominable in 'this thing is fucking abominable'

[Lumpy @LumpyTheCook]

Big misunderstanding of post-tumblr “fandoms” is thinking they exist to enjoy or discuss specific media. Not true! They exist to use media as an excuse to construct an alternative social hierarchy to gaslight each other in and mobilize to harass people. This IS their function

[garvy @garvvee]

People on twitter will really be like "you believe in voting? that pales in effectiveness to my strategy, being antisemitic”