Odd Duck

Had that one funny tweet that one time

[Odd Duck @RealOddDuck]

Starting a support group for people with OCD. Not because I have it, but that way they can come over and clean my house.

[Odd Duck @RealOddDuck]

@RadioFreeTom Al Capone was great?

[Odd Duck @RealOddDuck]

Very strange..looking at this account for the first time in a long time. Realizing most everyone on my lists has now gone silent. Feels a little apocalyptic, like the lone survivor wandering the wasteland of Twitter that was. Peace out old friends. It was a pretty good run.

[krista @kristabellerina]

I don’t care if the glass is half empty or half full but I do care if it makes it to the dishwasher when you’re done.

[💀SpookyLittleComic👻 @CunniLinguist77]

Ancient scribes would be appalled at our scrolls today.

[January James-Riggs @JanuaryJames]

If you see me smiling, I might be happy, or I might be plotting your murder. It could go either way.

[Odd Duck @RealOddDuck]

@saigey_babey For whatever reaon, this post was in my feed. Even though I don't know you, you should know that you do matter. You are enough. You are important. If a rando like me believes in you, please believe in yourself. Keep going! ☺️

[Pugnado 🐾🌪 @LuvPug]

It costs nothing to be kind.
It also costs nothing to tell someone to go fuck themselves

[January James-Riggs @JanuaryJames]

Why would anyone pay for a dating app when you can find unstable and emotionally unavailable people on Twitter for free.

[rolo of troy @TheRolo]

When at a GenX party talk about 90s music to break the ice ice baby

[Andy H. @AndyAsAdjective]

The Roomba vacuum cleaner just beat me to a piece of popcorn I dropped on the floor & this is how the war against the machines begins.

[Phillygirl @24tog]

The clocks change this weekend. Hopefully back to the 80’s when life was good.

[𝐀 𝐌 𝐀 𝐍 𝐃 𝐀 @littlegiinge]

Much like a puppy, I respond best when treats are involved.

[Brunette Bohemian @Jane_Doe82]

The twitter urge to be mostly silent for long stretches of time and then go manic in one night with 30 tweets in a row

[your other mom @difficultpatty]

Nothing prepared me for the part of adulthood where you look like a baby deer learning to walk every time you get out of bed in the morning.

[Murder Mittens @Miss__Kitty__]

Treat yourself today, being alive is the special occasion.

[Sarah Aaron @ShaeAaron]

Never follow your heart. It chases the taco truck.

[Busted Flip Flops @GrillinChillin9]

There is no such thing as too much lasagna. Lasagna loves you.

[DaddyJew @DaddyJew]

Whenever the brain and the heart fight it's always the liver that suffers.

[The Real Rodney Lacroix @RealRodLacroix]

We can deduct tax preparation fees from our taxes so I'm itemizing the $3,000 I spent on ink cartridges just to print out the forms.