Samarth Sharma

An actual person.
Eater, Drinker, Breather, Sleeper.

Mensan | Music & Literature Enthusiast ||

Insta: a_bad_magician

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

There shud b a law against dating girls who use captions like 'heels higher thn ur standards'. Thik hai behen exosphere mei zindagi guzar lo

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

Love yourself before you love somebody else, or just get drunk/stoned or whatever.

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

I don't need a New Year's kiss, gonna need some cold hard cash and a sense of purpose going forward.

Accepting donations, thanks. :)

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

@ridzgerald and I want inner peace, tough luck.

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

My ex had this really weird fetish where she would dress up as herself and then act like a total bitch.

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

Hey girl, are you easy?
Because I don't have a pick-up line.

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

So overdosed on Punjabi jokes, reading 'Santa' (Santa claus) as 'Santa' (Santa & Banta).

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

@thescarletdrape @poptype okay.

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

Life plan:

1. Build up
2. Cash in
3. Sell out
4. Bro down

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

Getting shut like-

Me: hey babe, what that mouth do? ;)

GF: complain.

[bananafanafofisa @lisaxy424]

Animal documentary narrator: the wolf pack plans their entire day around how they will get their next meal
Me: same

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

@thescarletdrape you sure about that?

[Skinnie Talls @SkinnieTalls]

Anything is possible, even that weird thing you've been thinking about, just don't hurt anybody while doing it.

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

I don't hate him.

I just wish uss haramkhor ki Maggi mein masala na nikle.

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

*wakes up*

Can this day get any worse? Ughhh.

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

No.
#mondaymotivation

[Christopher @TheBigBatman]

I'm in love with like 12 of you...don't make this weird.

[Samarth Sharma @that_1_sam]

Random relative: beta kya kar rahe ho aaj kal?
Me: bas aunty, disappoint kar raha hun.

[The Last of us @riddens_]

Love her like a poet

Fuck her like a writer