T Wayne 1010

Developer of Words

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

Most horses aren't nocturnal, except for the night mares.

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

Someone sent me an @ reply from an email. I decided not to retweet it, though.

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

@spacecrafff @GrianEgan @chalzamora @SalvadorViescaV @I_am_carbs @lazydoxy @SarcasmTutor @ParvulaRosa @weezeebee @pearlykim @PHorseFeathers @20bandtrashbag @naut4prophet @Athenaconstandi @Neokitty69 @NotKlingonRed @Expativa @Kat_ZenJammer Thanks, @spacecrafff!

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

They must have run out of Halloween candy on early voting day. They had plenty of stickers, though.

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

Act now. It’s not available in stores. In other words, it’s just another product available online.

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

“Mailboxes are one size, fits all.” - some delivery drivers

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

I stopped watching television a few months ago. I only watch political ads now.

[Cat From Nowhere @kv8]

The clowns change but the circus stays the same.

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

Favstar is for sale. There is just one problem. The renewal rate is more expensive.

[Susan W @Maxine12333]

Don't dwell on past mistakes. Soon as you make a few more, and you will, you'll forget the past ones.

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

You now have an unlimited DVR. There is only one problem. Everything fails to record.

[Rita 🌗🌖🌚🌞🌝🌛🌜 @RitaBarkley]

I had a cookie the other day. It was advertised as gluten-free, Paleo, vegan, lactose-free, and then I found out later I was eating an ice cube.

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

When people reminisce about decades, they don’t talk as much about the last one. It happened recently, plus nobody knows what to call it.

[Dr Whom @chapel3929]

It’s the weekend, you know what that means

Tire rotation party

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

There’s a mouse under your left eye. No, actually it’s just a really large insect.

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

When voting for the greatest drummers of all time, neighbors are always ranked last.

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

Reverse mortgages are popular, because financial planning is never that forward.

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

If your mask doesn’t feel safe, you may need to stop touching your face.

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

Never debate a busy robot. It will mop the floor with you. It might even mow the lawn.

[T Wayne 1010 @twayne1010]

“Where are the Tesla coils?” - a Tesla driver learning HVAC